I am so glad for the gift of friends.  Not just people I know, but people who are indeed friends.  I know many more people than I have friends, but I can honestly say that God has given me the treasure of many good friends.  They are not all like me, but I like them and they like me.  They don't all live in one place, but where ever I go and return, there are friends waiting for me.  By the grace of God I am a rich man in friends.  I am boasting in the Lord when I say that.  Earlier in my life I was a loner and lonely, so it hasn't always been this way for me.  In fact right before I received the Lord as my Savior, I had no real friends.  All my closer relationships had drifted away, and I had no more ability to make new ones.  Two people had maintained a caring relationship, and they were Christians.  

A few years ago I heard some research that talked about counting our wealth in other ways besides just gold and silver.  Two of the things that were on top of the list were "time" and "fiends".  It is interesting to note that success was not anywhere on the list.  So how do we end up having good friends?   Like any thing we want to see increase in, we have to invest in the future by sowing what we are expecting as a return.  The farmer sows seeds for an increase.  The investor sows money for the increase.   And for an increase of friends, we sow ourselves friendly.  

I was in a pizza joint yesterday with Martha and a friend, when a man walked by.  I could have let him go by without any interaction, but instead I asked him how church was today (people dressed up with ties and suits on Sunday early afternoon are likely to have gone to church, so I had a 99% guess factor going for me)  He stopped, we talked, and he made a comment that it was unusual for complete strangers to talk around here.  Well we talked, and introduced ourselves and then went on with life.  Now I don't think he will become a friend, but my point here is that he would never become a friend if I hadn't shown myself friendly. I am not the one to coin this phrase but it fits here so I will use it.  To have friends you first must show yourself to be friendly. 

Now to the hard part of this discussion.  When we are lonely, we are often isolated.  I know some people (I used to be one of them), that have no friends.  To me that is very sad.   They are very lonely people.  They are usually walled in, self absorbed, and dysfunctional (that was me!).  All this can change, but it seems like some folks live out their lives this way.  Now if you are reading this, and you don't have a lot of friends (or any) I have some good news for you.  We don't have to stay lonely.  

First of all, let's ask Jesus to come into the lonely, walled up parts of our hearts and begin to warm up those cold and isolated places.  He is better than a friend, but He is also the best friend we can ever have.  He is with us always, always willing to listen, always willing to help, always understanding, patient and gracious.  Who could ask for a better friend.  Then we can begin to take it to a new level and start reaching out to others with the same friendship that the Lord has given us.  If we are insecure, fearful of rejection or just plain selfish (as I was), the Lord can bring change to these heart conditions if we ask Him and receive what He does to heal us.  But sooner or later we will need to learn to invest in relationships so that we can grow meaningful and valuable friendships. 

One last thought:  We are designed by God to have good relationships, and good friends are a major part of this design.  Everybody needs friends, so the opportunities to have good friends are all around us if we will just take the time to invest in them with our friendship.   Not everyone will become close friends, but some will, and those that do will be treasures that money can't buy.  I don't think we will ever see the entire purpose of God fulfilled in our lives without good friends.

Written by a once friendless person who has been given the treasure of many friends.