Hospitality-with its image producing synonyms like welcome, warmth, kindness and generosity is such a wonderful emotional word. We tend to get very emotional over it-for either we love it or hate it; embrace it or shy away from it; or jump in with both feet or try to ignore the scriptures declaring that it is to be a part of those in leadership! If any of you are similar to me, you vacillate from one side to another.
One of the gifts my mother added to my life was the ability to "entertain". She and my father adopted my sisters and I when they were older and as a result had many established relationships both on the business and friendship levels. This meant that as we grew older they would entertain guests at both formal and informal gatherings. My father was a builder/realtor and as such would use our home occasionally as an example for prospective clients. The fact that my father could call my mother and notify her that within fifteen minutes or so she would be having guests meandering their way through our home left her with a mindset that our home would "always" be in perfect condition. Needless to say it affected my sisters and my lives as well. We were prohibited from sitting on our beds, which were to be made first thing in the morning and taught to put away any playthings immediately after using them. These are all good disciplines for every child to learn-but I did go through a season of life where I was "worried" about what people would think if my house was less than perfect.
Fortunately I also received my mom and dad's love for people. They built each of the homes we lived in with the idea of sharing it with others in mind. They worked with each other to produce times filled with love, laughter and the sharing of hearts. They demonstrated the gift of hospitality.
Have we as leaders promoted this ministry in our churches? I believe we need to re-discover the joys of practicing hospitality ourselves and to teach and train the church on how to add this to our lives.
Included in each list given for the requirements of a bishop or elder is the word hospitable. The Amplified Bible describes it this way: [he must be] hospitable [showing love for and being a friend to the believers, especially strangers or foreigners 1 Timothy 3:2.
Here are some great thoughts to help you renew your mind about hospitality:

• It is not just a "woman" thing. It is to be the characteristic of a person in leadership. The best scenario is for the whole family to practice this ministry together.
• It is not an option.
• It has a spiritual aspect. It is not simply something we do in our flesh but by the enabling of the Holy Spirit.
• The focus is to be on the giving of hospitality, not the receiving end. (I invited you, you haven't invited me, I'm offended, I'm offended!)
• It can be learned.Everyone can do it.
• It starts in our hearts…not in our pocketbooks.
• It is part of God's plan.

Sometimes we have to die to ourselves and let people know that we aren't perfect.
Paul lists several qualities of the Christian life.
Romans 12:9-13 in the Amplified Bible presents it very clearly. 9 [Let your] love be sincere (a real thing); hate what is evil [loathe all ungodliness, turn in horror from wickedness], but hold fast to that which is good. 10 Love one another with brotherly affection [as members of one family], giving precedence and showing honor to one another. 11 Never lag in zeal and in earnest endeavor; be aglow and burning with the Spirit, serving the Lord. 12 Rejoice and exult in hope; be steadfast and patient in suffering and tribulation; be constant in prayer. 13 Contribute to the needs of God's people [sharing in the necessities of the saints]; pursue the practice of hospitality.
Pursue the practice of hospitality, how do we do that?
First of all we need to recognize that since this is something that comes from the Father's heart-it is something that He will equip us to do. We must take the time to renew our minds in this area. Separate the world's view of "entertaining" from the godly view of hospitality. Entertaining brings with it the feeling that it is all up to us. I believe every time we practice hospitality God has a purpose. Sometimes it is simply to provide an atmosphere for bonding to take place, or seeds to be sown about the gospel. Sometimes we invite people over because the Lord knows they need a break from their routine and He is using us to provide such a break. Possibly, He wants to strengthen the fabric of your church by helping you discover hidden gifts and talents of the people you invite. No wonder the enemy of our soul fights this aspect of ministry so hard!
How can we do this?
Begin to ask the Lord for the spirit of hospitality to function in your heart. Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines hospitable as 1:a : given to generous and cordial reception of guests b : promising or suggesting generous and cordial welcome c : offering a pleasant or sustaining environment 2 : readily receptive : OPEN We need to start in our own hearts. Do you have a readily receptive heart to receive strangers as Hebrews 13:2 exhorts us? "Don't forget to show hospitality to strangers, for some who have done this have entertained angels without realizing it!"
Or do you shy away from even starting with your close friends or family?
Here are some suggestions that may help you develop this wonderful blessing.

• Pray for God's plan. Ask Him for the who. Who should I invite Lord? This does two things. First of all you begin with Him in mind which begins to take the focus off ourselves. Secondly, faith is released as we begin to cooperate with God in obedience and that releases peace and joy in anticipation of what can He accomplish.
• Keep it simple. If you are inviting people over for dinner-remember it is just one meal amongst many-it doesn't have to go down in their log books as the best meal they have ever eaten! It isn't the time to try something far out and exotic if you are just getting used to the idea of having people in your home. Think about the people God has put on your heart, what would make them feel loved and cared for? If you don't know them, then perhaps during your invitation conversation a simple query concerning possible allergies or likes and dislikes could be made.

There is a balance between throwing something together to get it over with and making something so complex that you are exhausted by the time they arrive and wish they would just go home. One friend I talked with confessed she never sits with her guests-she simply serves the food and spends her time between the kitchen and the table trying to clean things up as she goes with the different courses! I know when I am invited over I come for the people, not the food. Isn't that the same with others? They would rather have a simple meal and relaxed host/hostess.
One suggestion I was given was to plan different menus for the different types of occasions we find ourselves in. Formal meals, informal gatherings and spur of the moment "why don't you come on over for dinner?" My friend says that way she can focus on her guests not on the preparation. She makes sure she keeps on hand the ingredients so she is always ready to open her home as her heart leads.

• Clean up as you go. Keep a dish pan full of hot soapy water and as you finish with one pot or pan wash it quickly. If you have a dishwasher make sure it is empty before you sit down to eat, then you can put the dishes right into the dishwasher. Or at least stack them in the dishpan to soak.
• Encourage your family to help. Enlist the children by talking about the people you have invited. Let them help take coats, greet the people, etc. It is good training for them.
• Plan ahead. Make the dessert or salad in the morning or the day before, if possible.
• Don't break the bank. Fix something within your budget.
• Set a schedule. Don't over do it. Look realistically at your schedule, then pray and plan accordingly.
• If you are having simple dishes-then fancy up the plates and you will feel more festive.
• Pick a posy from the yard or a few fresh flowers from the grocery store and everyone will feel special!
• Encourage others to use their gifts of hospitality. Don't compare yourself among yourself. Just be yourself.